BeatlesMania 1 year, 6 months ago

Wow! Mom must be proud, Grandpa took junior out to the local brew pub! Yee haw!

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ChrisRocks 1 year, 6 months ago

Bad Parent Rule # 26 Take your kids to bars Because being a good parent is boring!

But you are nothing if not incredibly resourceful, so it’s easy to shed a few years of parental lameness by making one simple decision (and please note, this will go down as the single-greatest decision you’ve ever made): Just take your kids with you to bars.

Come on—It’s a Just a Little Smoke Young lungs, ears, and stomachs are resilient—they can handle the seedier qualities found in watering holes. Besides, this is supposed to be about you, too, so don’t overlook the perks:

You’ll always have a designated driver.

After enough beers, having him drive will seem like a good idea. You’ll never have to hail a cab again—or worse—get behind the wheel of your mini-van after several martinis. Extensive research, conducted in European cities that we have trouble spelling and pronouncing, note that it’s easy to keep your child awake with a steady diet of Coke, salty bar nuts, and stale pretzels (also good for strengthening kiddie gums and molars).

When the bartender won’t serve you another screwdriver and it’s clear you’ve made an ass of yourself long enough, just toss your child the car keys. (What? He’s not old enough to drive? Well he’s not old enough for bars either—and that didn’t stop you.)

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