There was a time I wrote too many letters to The Pilot, to the point where Mr. Bouser had to email me to restrict my production. Now I want to make up for lost time.

But you know, like, it’s hard to, like, find the time to, like, type the letter. It’s crazy. My letters were usually awesome, like, really, like, cool, I thought. Not all agreed.

Sorry. It was a special time in my life to be, like, well, you know, appreciated by a few people. It was just awesome. I’ve got a bunch of really cool material at my fingertips, but I can’t get going.

It’s crazy, like, you know, I can’t explain it. Maybe, like, I need to turn off the TV, hit a golf ball through it. Wouldn’t that be really cool and special and crazy, too, and awesome? Maybe then, well, like, I’ll get my bearings back and be able to forget the four most cherished words in America these days. Everything is either cool, awesome, crazy or special.

Drop these words in your daily dialogue, I’m begging you. Strive to be better than, like, the herd. Be the individual you were created to be.

And, y’all are killing my creativity.

Bill Schwenk

Southern Pines