Blue Devils’ Advocate Sounds Off

Friday, April 9, 2010

On the subject of college basketball — my alma mater Duke, in particular — my lips have been sealed for months.

That’s partly because of the old wives’ superstition “Tsk-tsk-tsk (practice spraying spit with each tsk). Don’t say it or it won’t happen.” I never said the Blue Devils would win the NCAA championship, so they did.

During this mute interlude, I studied the “hate Duke” phenomenon. Or, at the very least, the “anybody but Duke” rant. I read sports columns and blogged my eyes out. I questioned friends and strangers, sober and not. I listened with a reasonably open mind.

I even reread parts of the Duke-dissers bible “To Hate Like This Is to Be Happy Forever,” a virulent explanation of the Duke-Carolina basketball rivalry by Will Blythe, to whom I say: You sure don’t sound so happy, Will. You sound like an ulcer in progress.

Duke detractors fall into three categories: those who hate the team, those who hate the school, and those who hate both. They concur that Dookies are arrogant, name-dropping Yankee intellectuals who sit around clinking Heinekens while checking their portfolios in The Wall Street Journal. I say Heineken because Ty Heineken, scion of the Dutch brewing family, was in my history class at Duke.

So how do you know they weren’t reading the WSJ sports page? It does have one. As for arrogant, how can any student or player grab that appellation from Maryland’s Greivis Vasquez, the ACC Player of the Year? He’s obnoxious and disrespects Duke, too, but nobody cares.

Anyway, before a modest gloat — and with the sole intent of sounding defensive — now that the Bad Fairy can do no harm, I want to address some of the Duke-haters’ accusations, basketball and otherwise:

— Dookies are spoiled trust-fund kids.

And the crime is ... ? Every society operates on a curve. I see plenty of Range Rovers with Jersey plates in Chapel Hill. True, these days it seems you have to be either affluent, smart, a study nerd or fast-talker to get into Duke. Or Harvard. Or M.I.T. Anybody heard of a Hate Harvard Club?

As for rich, at Duke I worked on the dorm switchboard and typed term papers for extra money, which I squandered on artichokes and a subscription to The New Yorker.

— Duke is a poseur. It doesn’t represent North Carolina.

Who says it should? Duke doesn’t claim to be a state university with preferential tuition and admission for North Carolina residents. Hurl a few insults at Wake Forest, why don’tcha?

— When Coach K scrunches up his nose, he looks like a rat. (This, verbatim from “Battle for Tobacco Road,” the excellent HBO documentary about the Duke-Carolina hoops rivalry.)

So don’t look. Bet you’d adopt a few ratlike scrunches for $3.6 million, his salary (before perks and endorsements) in 2008. I never joined the Rat Pack, but at least Coach K doesn’t roll his eyes, throw up his hands and act disgusted with his players like that good-looking white-haired guy in the pale-blue tie.

— Officials and bracket-makers favor Duke. This even has a name: the Duke Bias.

Look, some first seed had to play University of Arkansas at Pine Bluff. Show me a serial no-call ref and I’ll show you a pink slip.

— Duke fields too many prep-school white guys.

This is all over the blogs, honestly. Talk about racism. But I hear Jon Scheyer enjoys the “Jewish Jordan” moniker. Obviously, the Plumlee brothers (with another in the wings) learned more than manners at the fancy prep school they attended. At least it’s in North Carolina. And remember that Duke players maintain a high profile amid criticism of “student athletes” from all backgrounds who bide their time and bulk up waiting for the NBA draft.

I hear somebody saying “… because they’re not good enough.”

White, green, black; clean-cut, shaggy, tattooed or not, the Devils seem like a nice bunch of boys, an unselfish band of brothers who execute smart plays conceived by an experienced coach. I should know. I missed only one televised game this season.

— Duke destroyed the “tiny” Butler Bulldogs’ David-and-Goliath quest.

The mismatch between David and Goliath was size. Uh-oh. Butler’s undergraduate enrollment is about 4,000, Duke’s 6,400. And, as I recall from two semesters of Bible study required for graduation, David felled Goliath with a slingshot-fired rock between the eyes. No ref would no-call that. If their personable young coach stays on for 30 years through good seasons and horrific, Butler will triumph.

— The Cameron Crazies are a-holes.

This is a euphemism for well-organized and effective. Without the Crazies’ “Zoooob” moan, Brian Zoubek might never have come out of his coma.

— Duke won by a fluke. The Blue Devils could not have beaten Kentucky or Kansas.

Maybe. We’ll never know.

The fact is they won, fair and square, in a hard-fought, exciting, well-matched championship game unmarred by brawls, injuries or intentional fouls. Coaches and commentators agree on this. If anyone thinks otherwise, let’s hash it out over a beer.

My treat, if you’re drinking Heineken.

Contact Deborah Salomon at debsalomon@nc.rr.com.

More like this story

CSmithson 3 years, 1 month ago

Deb,

I enjoyed your article. However, I do think you mostly picked the weaker anti-Duke arguments. The better reasons to hate Duke include Coach K's on-court demeanor, Laettner, Hurley, Wojo, Reddick, the highly-coached flopping, floor-slapping, their huge reliance on 3-point shooters, etc.

Go Heels!

Chris Smithson

Gumby 3 years, 1 month ago

I've lived all over the country and the anti-Duke feeling is widespread. People don't feel that way for no good reason. And, trust me, it isn't because we're jealous.

There are two main reasons in my opinion: The first is the perception gap that the media create, particularly Dick Vitale. The second is the perversion of the game that has resulted from the flopping and flailing that Duke players have gotten away with over the years.

On the first: The media tell us Coach K is wonderful and is smart the way he "works the officials". Anyone watching TV sees a sneering guy, screaming at officials, intimidating them, and dropping f-bombs. We're told how wonderful and smart the Cameron Crazies are. But anyone watching TV can see that they are unsportsmanlike, obnoxious, and oftentimes cruel. (Example: at the Final Four the Duke students would count down the shot clock when the other team had the ball, but they would count as if there were fewer seconds left on the shot clock than there really were to try to get the other team to hurry a shot. Maybe that seems clever and noteworthy to some people but I think it is childish and unsportsmanlike). It is the perpetuation of a myth.

On the second point. Dean Smith was a great innovator in the game of basketball. The only innovation of Coach K that I can think of is this idea that they have perfected at Duke of "selling the call". That is, you flop and flail and fall down to create the image in the eyes of the officials that you were fouled. And for Duke it has worked to perfection. Many people who understand and appreciate basketball are just rubbed the wrong way by this. I don't think it is a stretch to say it is close to cheating. The players are deliberately faking a foul and it works. So generally less athletic Duke teams have a great equalizer with their often more athletic opponents that many objective observers see for the travesty that it is. It is a perversion of the spirit of the game of basketball, I am telling you. And no one on TV ever calls them on it. Amazing. One reason that Duke winning this year didn't bother me so much was that the game was played pretty straight up. You could argue a call here or there, and Scheyer tried a couple of times to do his little flail thing he does, but the refs weren't buying it, to their credit. So I feel like they won a straight up contest which I can respect. If that had always been the case I really don't think you'd have nearly as many Duke haters out there.

I don't care if Duke shoots a lot of 3's. That's just a strategy. Lots of teams do that. I don't care that it is an expensive private school comprised of a lot of kids from the Northeast. There are a lot of expensive private schools. That may bother people in North Carolina who don't like Yankees, but I have friends in CA who don't even understand that concept who can't stand Duke for the primary reasons I've outlined above. Just sayin'.

Gumby Nashville Carolina Club

debsalomon 3 years, 1 month ago

Thank you, Gumby, for the insight. Please note that you, not I, used the word "jealous" Nor did I mention Dick Vitale...this time. Last column, I admitted to pushing the mute button when he's announcing. Only two points concern me: If "flopping fouls" are attributed to Duke strategy, and they work, wouldn't it make sense for other teams to immitate? And then, wouldn't they be as guilty? I can't imagine (perhaps naively) that a variety of refs put up with this, especially with instant replay. I feel certain that Duke takes as many legal fouls as possible...because their average at the line is so good. Also, despite the Crazies' efficiency and organization, that they could repeatedly co-ordinate the erroneous shot-clock countdown. But let's say they do: If you and others notice, surely the coaches are on to this, and warn players to disregard. I am not a defender of bad sportsmanship and only support the Crazies for the vibes they give their team...no matter how the team is doing. The bond between players and Crazies spurs both on as well as cushioning defeats. I think people who hate Duke nit pick for things to feed their habit. This has become an industry but, I'm happy to say, hasn't seemed to hurt the university's image in athletics or academics. Not only did I (and my daughter) get an excellent education there but, after 50 years, I still feel a connection -- and pride when Duke graduates are recognized nationally for achievements in medicine, business, etc. I just wish more North Carolinians would join me in in cheering all our college teams. In fact, I'm probably not too popular in Durham after going on record as LOVING Tar Heel basketball. I could have watched Danny Green all day. I always want them to win, except against Duke. What a credit that NC has four prominent ACC teams and, for the second consecutive year, has brought home the championship. Oh, and incidentally...I was shocked and gratified to receive an email from Will Blythe, author of "To Hate Like This is to be Happy Forever." He suggested I be the one to write the Duke response to his book.... Not a chance. Too many Carolina crazies out for blood.

intrepidreader 3 years, 1 month ago

Any lingering use I had for the Cameron Crazies (and there was very little) was wiped out the night they were shining a laser pen in the eyes of Virginia players at the free throw line. What made it all even more egregious was that the game should have been forfeited but because it was Duke, nobody got punished for it.