I can't take it anymore.

Whenever you turn on the TV, the media shove the same things down your throat. You know what I'm talking about. It's like the world is one giant broken record.

Those who know me best will tell you I'm not the most patient person in the world. I have a tendency to blow my stack when something ticks me off. And right now, I'm ticked off.

So today, I'd like to use this space to vent. I want to analyze a few of the things that annoy me most that we are forced to endure constantly on television.

1. Zac Efron: This guy is starring in every single movie in America right now. That's a bit of an exaggeration, but it sure feels like it. If you don't know who he is, he's the teenybopper star from Disney's "High School Musical" series. Efron has come out with some other film and is rumored to be in others. He's also appeared on just about every talk show in the past few months. Something about him just irritates me.

2. ESPN: The ultimate hype machine. If you're a fan of the Boston Red Sox, Terrell Owens, Brett Favre, the Los Angeles Lakers, or the NFL Draft, you probably love it. But I think the "Worldwide Leader" has absolutely destroyed sports coverage. Highlights no longer exist. Instead it's the same "in your face" relentless garbage over and over again. Boo ya!

3. Cable News: I can't rip apart ESPN without calling out the cable news outlets that are just as guilty. There's no objective journalism anymore. Instead, we have a collection of arrogant talking heads whose only concern is boosting their own egos. More importantly, the nasty tone of these shows has permeated society and has contributed to the political polarization that is so rampant in this country.

4. Prescription Drug Commercials: No, no, NO! When I'm trying to relax, the absolute last things I want to hear about are enlarged prostates, incontinence and genital herpes. Gross! Mirapex, Flomax, Cialis, Valtrex, Viagra -- where do they come up with these names? Plus these stupid ads list out so many symptoms they trick you into thinking something's wrong with you. Doctors, not marketing departments, are supposed to prescribe medication.

5. "Brangelina": Hollywood's most famous couple, Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie, keep on truckin', reproducing or adopting children about every six weeks. Fortunately for us, all major news organizations are there to cover every annoying detail. There's even a "brangelina.net" for the real fans. I don't get the obsession over these two. Sad thing is, I used to like Brad Pitt.

6. Taco Bell Commercials: Doesn't the one with the guy dressed up as a pregnant woman trying to smuggle nachos into a football game make you want to throw your remote through the wall? Maybe I should find a new job in the advertising world so I can be overpaid to dream up gems like that.

7. Twitter: I saved the worst offender for last. You can't escape it. It's everywhere. I was watching my beloved Cincinnati Reds play the Astros the other day, and even the announcers were talking about it. How did it infect an out-of-market baseball game on the MLB Extra Innings package?

Personally, I don't even know what Twitter is. I've heard it's some sort of blogging program where people post "tweets," or short blurbs, about what they're doing at some particular moment, like, "I'm going to the bank" or "Work is so boring right now" or "I can't wait to play tennis this afternoon." Guess what? I don't care!

Apparently you can subscribe to different profiles, including celebrities, and follow them. Ashton Kutcher, for some reason, has a million followers. Why? Honestly, have our lives gotten so boring that we have to live vicariously through other people's errands?

Whew. I feel better, even if I sound like an old curmudgeon.

Contact John Krahnert III at 693-2473 or by e-mail at jkrahnert@thepilot.com