The Pilot's limerick contest for September gave readers this leading line: "Reality shows? How 'bout this..."

The winning entry was submitted by Lenore Johnsen, who once again attains the coveted title of Limerick Laureate. Her two verses:

Reality shows? How 'bout this:

Give them all a great big goodbye kiss.

The realists have had it,

And yes, while we're at it,

"Law & Order" should be on the list.

Reality shows? How 'bout this:

We channel them to the abyss.

For pushing such dreck

They should all rot in heck.

To the networks, boo-boo and hiss-hiss!

Lenore Johnsen was born in Michigan, and graduated from Western Michigan University, where she majored in art. She went on to teach English to middle and high school students in Ohio.

Following that, Lenore advanced to human resources director for a book publishing company in New York. From 2004-2005, she served in Ukraine as a Peace Corps volunteer -- "One of the best things I've ever done," she said.

Lenore has lived in Southern Pines for two and a half years. She sharpened her poetic skills writing limericks for friends on special occasions. She also paints.

This entry from Wally Stefany, also of Southern Pines, was a gas.

Reality shows? How 'bout this:

An incoming frosh at Ole Miss

Thinks he'll rent him a pal

(Sign says "Four bucks a gal.")

Station owner says "Son, that ain't this."

Regina Armswood of Pinehurst knows that less is more.

Reality shows? How 'bout this...

A show where there's nothing amiss.

The screen black and quiet.

You might like it. Try it!

At times, it could bring you pure bliss.

Jim Shamp of Durham views reality as an everyday thing.

Reality shows? How 'bout this:

The concept is just ludicrous!

My trailer park's real.

So here is the deal:

Come visit, and see what you've missed.

Adroit wordplay is exhibited in Jim's second limerick.

Reality shows? How 'bout this:

Just feature my unwedded Sis!

She don't fear rejection.

She ran for election.

And now she's a hit as a miss.

Far from myopic, Kirk and Shari Hasenmueller embrace a cosmic theme.

Reality shows? How 'bout this:

Two space aliens reminisce

About sunsets on Mars

And on nearby stars,

And whether each other exists.

Whereas Ted Atwood of Seven Lakes muses on a global level.

Reality shows? How 'bout this...

It's a concept too great to dismiss:

To Stonehenge we'll go,

Stage a live TV show

At sunrise on the winter solstice!

Jean Matyas of Anchorage, Alaska, understandably opts for a warm scenario.

Reality shows? How 'bout this:

Old ladies out searching for bliss

Arrange for a game show

Where only the men go,

First prize is a hug and a kiss!

This gelid approach comes from Ken Layton of Carthage.

Reality shows? How 'bout this?

Let's drop all the shows in an abyss,

And let none of them out.

This would be, without doubt,

An action that just couldn't miss.

A career advancement program comes compliments of Raleigh's Harry Brooks.

Reality shows? How 'bout this:

Bosses offer their butts for a kiss.

Not exactly a rose

Even to a brown nose,

More like staring into the abyss!

Dr. Charles Wood of Southern Pines offers this silver lining.

Reality shows? How 'bout this:

Conservatives give them a "dis."

Their sponsors do well,

Their products will sell,

And there are some you don't want to miss!

Mark Bamberry thinks the best plot is no script.

Reality shows? How 'bout this:

Real meets fantasy -- sealed with a kiss.

Fiction or fallacy, which can it be?

Trapped on an island without a TV,

Spontaneous life with a script that can't miss!

Regardless of candidates, Judy Auch says vote!

Reality shows? How 'bout this...

Let us just call it politics.

Say what folks want to hear

Add false statements and fear;

Not to worry, just vote -- do not miss!

This is the leading line for our latest contest: Said Tom Turkey, "The thing I most hate..."

The deadline is Oct. 31, but Tom is sensitive about the publication date -- Nov. 30, three days after Thanksgiving. Here's an example to kick-start your efforts.

Said Tom Turkey, "The thing I most hate

Is a long presidential debate.

Who's weak an' who's tough an'

They're all full of stuffin',

Including that daft running mate!"

Nov. 30 is also the deadline of our new limerick contest, selections for which will appear on Dec. 28. The leading line: "Thought Santa, while loading his sled..." Could he be considering a career change?

E-mail your verses to joelimericks@embarqmail.com. Or mail them to Limericks, The Pilot, PO Box 58, Southern Pines, NC 28388. By submitting limericks, you agree to have them edited and published at any time without compensation.

Seven Lakes resident Joe Piper can be reached by e-mailing joelimericks@embarqmail.com.